Currently Playing Mezzanine By Massive Attack see related

Feeling: extremely gloomy bear-ish

When I went back to Singapore over the new year, something changed within me. Perhaps it was laying old demons to rest, past regrets. Or the stark realisation that I’m going to have to finally knuckle down and actually get serious. People think I'm serious now. HA.

Much as I hate to admit it, I am for all my westernised outlook, a traditionalist at heart. Or in some aspects anyway.

And it is in this respect that I realise I have 6 months left. 6 months of being a student before the real big bad world swoops down and I’m swept away in suits, court shoes, immaculate coifs, tax returns that can’t actually be filled in by myself, job hunting, (eventual) marriage and baby milling plans.

The only plus point is that I don’t actually have to juggle bills anymore since I’ll be living with my parents. Convincing them that you can actually use telephones to do so is an entirely different matter.

and all this seems shallow in comparison when I realise that maybe, just maybe, it may be up to ME. irresponsible, crazy, stubborn, me, to run the family. To bring home the bacon AND cook it, to do the bills, to settle the tax,, to ask for help.